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Why Self-Love is SO Important

Self-Love is not:
It doesn’t mean you can’t love another
When we are in love with ourselves, then we can love everyone and everything forever.

Self-Love is not
how few wrinkles you have,
or how big or small your belly is,
or your muscles,
or how much money you made last year,
or, or, or
whether you are married,
drive a Mercedes,
or live in a million-dollar house.

Self-Love is an inside job!
It is a love for yourself
no matter what you do or don’t do,
feel or don’t feel, 
think or don’t think,
accomplish or don’t.

Self-Love is an unconditional love,
a love without conditions,
a love that brings compassion, forgiveness, an open-heart and kindness
for yourself, for others,

True Self-Love is our Ground
We feel safe and protected,
we can go deeper and deeper into life,
embrace people who are different from us.
it is the open door to inspiration, intuition, and revelation,
and a holding space for our thoughts, feelings and bodily sensations.

True Self-Love is our wholeness
and when we have it:

  • We have a beautiful relationship with ourselves.

  • We don’t take things personally.

  • Our relationships improve.

  • So do our conversations and communications.

  • We are deeply connected to the web of life.

  • We feel full inside, not hungry, empty, lonely.

  • It is highly likely that we will practice self-care.

  • It is highly likely that we show up and contribute our best to life.

  • We take more risks, have the courage to fail and succeed.

  • It is more likely that we celebrate the all and the everything.

  • We see more beauty.

  • It is more likely that we will succeed at our passions because they are real and true and not because we need love or prove we are enough.

When we are in love with ourselves, then we can love everyone and everything forever.  Love is the natural state of relationship between everyone.

Self Love can be learned.

On this Valentine’s Day, and everyday, whether you are in a romantic relationship or not, have a loving relationship with family and celebrate self-love! Then you will be more in love with all of life, forever.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Breathing and the Power of Letting go!

Want to live and love more deeply?

Want to feel more empowered to be yourself and more creative in your work?

Want to experience letting go in your body-mind and a new kind of freedom?

Working with the breath and voice is one of the most empowering ways to learn to let go and be free. If you can’t let go in your body, you can’t let go in your mind. The more you can let go, the more you will experience the true joy of being alive. 

Years ago I experienced an opening of my heart, seeing with new eyes and experiencing a transformation, a radical paradigm shift of what life is. It lasted a brief three weeks and left rapidly. But never to be forgotten.  

So many of us are unaware of how we breathe and if we have an issue we don’t know how to repair it. In the early days I had no idea there was anything wrong with my breathing. Because breathing is involuntary we forget that we can use our conscious mind to affect it and change it. Voice work is a potent way of developing breathing. Voice and mind are synergistic; each helping develop the other.

When I first began studying breathing I was at my doctor’s office. He said “make a muscle” and without thinking my old habit popped in, I took a big inhale and made a muscle. Immediately I remembered my latest affirmation: “Live life on the exhale.”  So I told the doctor I wanted to make another muscle. This time making a muscle on the exhale, I observed that I used less energy and effort and had a stronger muscle. It was an epiphany.

The relaxed exhale is the key to full and free breathing, an embodied voice, and being centered in the present moment. The more you develop your exhale the more you can let go, surrender, open, be vulnerable and know your strength. The more you can connect with yourself and life.

The more you are living on your relaxed exhale, the more you are letting go, the more you are in harmony with the power of the universe.  

Realizing that letting go is empowering and not weak is quite important. Letting go opens you up to yourself and allows a free self to emerge. In our culture we don’t honor letting go and not pushing; we think it’s weak.  

Are you resonating with what I am saying about breath, voice and the power of letting go?

If what I am saying talks to you may want to investigate the new in-person workshops I am giving in NYC. Dates will be announced soon. Click here to read more about the workshop.

To your fullest, richest life,

inside and out,


On Freedom and Love this Valentine's Day

{There are two types of living. One is fear-oriented; the other is love-oriented.}

How is your love this Valentine’s Day? Perhaps the most loving thing you could do on Valentine’s Day is to reflect on your relationship. Don’t judge. Reflect with compassion and kindness.

The more aware we become of what it means to live in a fear-based life, as opposed to a love-oriented one, the more can see and know where we live in our romantic relationships. The poem below makes this contrast vivid and poignant for us. We can apply the lessons in this beautiful poem by Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh to our relationships with family, friends and colleagues, in addition to our romantic relationships.

Most of us have relationships which contain both fear and love, as opposed to being strictly fear-based or strictly love-based. This can also be true of our relationships with ourselves. What really matters is that we can identify what fear looks like and what love offers, hold both, and choose what we want to energize and what we want our relationships to grow into.

Don't Hold Back by Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh
Brought to you by Dr. Lynda Klau

A relationship is one of the mysteries of life.
and because it exists between two
it depends on both.

Whenever two persons meet,
a new world is created..
Just by their meeting,
a new phenomenon comes into
existence –
one which was not, before,
one which never existed before.
And through that new phenomenon,
both persons
are changed and transformed.

Unrelated, you are one thing:
you immediately become something
A new thing has happened.

In the beginning, only peripheries meet.
If the relationship grows intimate,
becomes closer,
becomes deeper,
then, by and by,
centers start meeting.
When centers meet,
it is called love.

Where peripheries meet,
it is called acquaintance.
You touch the person from without,
just from the boundary,
then it is acquaintance.
Many times,
you start calling your acquaintance
your love.
Then you are in a fallacy.
Acquaintance is not love.

blog pic.jpg

Love is very rare.
To meet a person at his center
is to pass through a revolution in
because if you want to meet a person
at his center,
you will have to allow that person
to reach your center also.
You will have to become vulnerable,
absolutely vulnerable,
absolutely vulnerable,

It is risky.
To allow someone to reach your center
is risky and dangerous.
You never know what that person will do
to you.
Once all your secrets are known,
once your hiddenness has become
once you are exposed completely,
what the other person will do
you never know.
Fear is there.
That’s why we never open.

You can allow somebody
to enter you to your centers
only when you are not afraid,
when you are not fearful.

So, I say to you
there are two types of living,
One is fear-oriented;
The other is love-oriented.

Fear-oriented living
can never lead you into a deep

You remain afraid,
and the other cannot be allowed
to penetrate you to your very core.
Up to an extent,
you allow the other to penetrate.
Then a wall comes
and everything stops.

The love-oriented person
is the religious person.
The love-oriented person
is one who is not afraid of the future,
one who is not afraid of the result
or of the consequence,
one who lives here and now.

That’s what Krishna says to Arjuna
in the Gita:
Don’t be bothered about the result.
That is the fear-oriented mind.
Don’t think about what will happen.
Just be here, and act totally.

Don’t calculate.
A fear-oriented mind
is always calculating,
His whole life is lost in this way.

When you are not afraid,
then there is nothing to hide,
then you can be open,
then you can withdraw all boundaries,
then you can invite the other
to penetrate you to the very core.

And remember,
If you allow somebody to penetrate you
the other will allow you to penetrate
into himself or into herself.
When you allow somebody to penetrate
trust is created.
When you are not afraid,
the other becomes fearless.

Kabir has said somewhere:
I look into people.
They are so afraid, but I can’t see why.
They have nothing to lose.

It is like a person who is naked,
but never goes to take a bath in the river
because he is afraid his clothes will be

This is the situation you are in:
you have no clothes,
but you are always afraid of losing them.
What have you got to lose?
This body will be taken by death.
Before it is taken by death,
give it to love.

Whatsoever you have will be taken away.
Before it is taken away,
why not share it?

That is the only way of possessing it.
If you can share
and give,
you are the master.

It is going to be taken away.
There is nothing you can retain forever.
Death will destroy everything.

So, if you follow me rightly,
the struggle is between death and love.
If you can give,
there will be no death.
Before anything can be taken away from
you will already have given it.
You will have made it a gift.
There can be no death.

For a lover, there is no death.
For a nonlover, every moment is a death,
because, every moment,
something is being snatched away from
The body is disappearing –
he is losing it every moment.
Then there will be death
and everything will be annihilated.

What is the fear?
Why are you so afraid of being known?
Even if everything is known about you
and you are an open book,
why do you fear?
How can it harm you?

The fear is just a false conception,
given by society,
that you have to hide,
that you have to protect yourself,
that you constantly
have to be
in a fighting mood,
that everybody is an enemy,
that everything is against you.

Nobody is against you,
Even if you feel somebody is against you,
he, too, is not against you.
everybody is concerned with himself,
not with you.

There is nothing to fear.
This has to be realized
before a real relationship can happen.
There is nothing to fear.


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May your relationships flourish,